Tag Archives: train

Convergence and Coincidence

And so we went to Thirsty Thursday, as her short-haired friend liked to call it. Thirsty Thursday was the cutesy name for the four of us gathering around her friend’s dining room table making stilted, domestic chit-chat and drinking poorly made gin-and-tonics.

Thirsty Thursday used to just be three, but her friend went and got herself a boyfriend – bald, midwestern, decently friendly. He worked in a train yard, kept a tally of how many vagrants he busted riding the rails.

I drank six poorly made gin-and-tonics, slept until 2 pm. I woke up with a terrible headache and a half-baked plan to take up model railroad.

“Enjoy yourself last night?”

Her voice rattled against the insides of my skull, causing me to wince. “I always do.”

“You wouldn’t shut up about trains and” – a dramatic pause – “their symbolism as great modernity or some shit.”

I dropped my head back on the pillow. “Sounds like something I’d say. Trains are always going forward after all. Progress.”

“Whatever.”

I closed my eyes. “Remember how I used to live next to some tracks?”

“Yeah. I used to fantasize about your death by train.”

She heard me sigh, then added: “Now that would be progress.”

 


Complicated and Enlightening

The train’s repetitive click-clack wakes her every night.

“Did you hear that noise,” she asked the morning after she first stayed the night, nose pressed against my cheek, head sunk deep into her pillow.

“It was the train,” I replied, feeling myself fall in love.

“Charming. Does it come through here every night?”

“It does.”

“Great. You’re lucky I like you.”

I propped myself up on my elbow, glanced around the room: wine bottles, condom wrappers, and empty chocolate boxes. “We should do something else some time.”

“Why?” She climbed on top of me.

She moved in with me several weeks later, complaining about the train. Then we started to fight, and our nightly bingeing on wine, sex, and chocolate gave way to heavy silence and passive aggression.

As our relationship worsened she took to walking the train tracks at night.

“I’m not going to kill myself, K, relax,” she said.

I was unconvinced. So I walked with her, behind her, like a scolded but loyal pet. I bought her expensive earrings, tried to cheer her up. She pushed me in front of the train.

Now she sleeps in my bed, wakes with a smile whenever the train rumbles past.

 


Eau de Shiga Naoya

I had been hit by a train so went to Q Resort to convalesce for a week. The doctor said the damage wasn’t bad, but had urged me to take time for myself. So I made the journey to Q Resort.

I spent most of my time at Q Resort sitting out on my veranda and staring absently at the world beyond. There were mountains covered in snow. There was a stream, partially frozen. Etc. I reflected on my brush with death.

One day I found a dead cockroach in my room at Q Resort. I didn’t tell the Hispanic maid; I left the cockroach where it died because it seemed peaceful. The Hispanic maid must have found it because two days later it was gone. I was bereft, a little, but made due, and used the experience to reflect further on the nature of living and dying.

Convincing myself that all life culminates majestically in death, I jumped from the edge of my veranda one night.

Because my room at Q Resort was on the second floor, however, I ended up only with a badly sprained ankle. Unable to walk, I extended my stay at Q Resort another week.