Tag Archives: heart break

The Blood Reemerging

The door creaked open. The bald florist on the other side offered K the same expression he offers him every year on the thirtieth of December – looking somewhat like a vet explaining to a crying child the fate of her shar-pei.

“Happy anniversary, K,” said the florist, presenting the same maudlin bouquet of half-dead flowers he presents every thirtieth of December.

“Thanks,” replied K heavily, reaching one arm through the gap in the door. “No card, I suppose?”

The florist shook his head. “I’m afraid not.” He looked at K with no expression: “Why do you keep putting yourself through this?”

K propped the rotting flowers on his hip. “I don’t know. I keep hoping that maybe this year it will be her knocking instead of” – he paused – “well, you. Not that I don’t like you.”

“It won’t, K. It’s been five years. She’s not coming back. At least she remembers your wedding day,  I guess.” The florist shrugged and took his leave.

K closed the door and set the dying flowers – her favorites – on the kitchen table.

He then marked in his calendar exactly 51 weeks into the future, when he would place his next order with the bald florist.


Processes of Abstraction

For a moment neither of us spoke. She had taken up smoking, was practiced in exhaling through her nose. It was cool, I admit. She leaned hard on her elbows, took a moment to glare at me, and jammed her cigarette violently into its ashtray. Music from a neighbor’s stereo was stirring somewhere outside.

“It’s a terrible thing, what happened,” she sighed, lighting another cigarette.

I couldn’t disagree, but I said nothing. She had painted her apartment this odd shade of light blue. Through the haze (she had been smoking all night), the walls took on a dinghy, worn look – like a discarded Tiffany’s bag.

“What did you expect,” she said abruptly, pissed that I wasn’t listening. “You left. I had to stay here. I threw out all your shit and painted over your poems. They were good, really good. But they had to go.”

My eyes burned from the smoke, and from fourteen hours of driving. I swallowed the rest of my martini.

“I write fiction now,” I said in a way that I found impressively detached. Then I walked to her desk and unearthed a Sharpie from under a pile of cords, papers, and letters (unopened) from me.